I believe you have to read Dusapin's short text much the way you listen to a piece of music or look at a painting: you have to absorb its message at your own pace, read it again, and reflect on it.

Born in 1955, Pascal Dusapin can look back on decades of writing music and he is in a position to summarize his experiences in these few lines. Of course, he has much in common with the experiences of his colleagues. When he talks of the need to “unlearn,” he probably means the same thing as Chaya Czernowin when she talks of the need to achieve genuine loneliness. Dusapin puts three dots after “History is something we live with” indicating, I suppose, much the same thing that Iannis Xenakis did when he said he wished to sever his contacts with the past so that each new work would be a wholly novel departure. He of course was aware of the hopelessness of his undertaking.)

“I knew nothing of jealousy”—with once again followed by three dots to indicate that so much underlies those words. Does he mean jealousy he has felt or has encountered? Perhaps he means both, although he does say he has never fought against others, merely against himself. That again is intriguingly rich in implications. Artists in whatever domain will surely understand just what Dusapin has gone through in creating his own world in music.

Fighting against your own virtuosity—what a graphic description of the danger inherent in allowing ideas to flow all too easily from your pen. Your brain has developed certain patterns, they wait ready-made to be summoned. Once you have banished history, the next step for you is to banish your own … (if I may use my own three dots).

October 31, 2015

Dear Bálint,

Courage comes principally from unlearning; to never again speak of the past, not even the beginning. History is something we live with … Never again say it takes courage (very presumptuous …), and that it was so hard to begin. Obviously it was not easy, but I was joyful and I still am fighting to keep that feeling today.