Book contents
- Frontmatter
- Contents
- Preface and Acknowledgments
- 1 Introduction to the Minding Concept
- 2 Minding: Definition and Components
- 3 Knowing and Being Known by One's Partner
- 4 Attributions in Close Relationships
- 5 Acceptance, Respect, Reciprocity, and Continuity
- 6 Beginnings and Endings
- 7 Minding in the Close Relationship Literature
- 8 Minding and Other Major Concepts of Closeness
- 9 Evidence about Minding in Close Relationships
- 10 An International Perspective on Minding
- 11 Minding in Couples Therapy and Counseling
- 12 Limitations and Future Directions
- References
- Index
1 - Introduction to the Minding Concept
Published online by Cambridge University Press: 14 September 2009
- Frontmatter
- Contents
- Preface and Acknowledgments
- 1 Introduction to the Minding Concept
- 2 Minding: Definition and Components
- 3 Knowing and Being Known by One's Partner
- 4 Attributions in Close Relationships
- 5 Acceptance, Respect, Reciprocity, and Continuity
- 6 Beginnings and Endings
- 7 Minding in the Close Relationship Literature
- 8 Minding and Other Major Concepts of Closeness
- 9 Evidence about Minding in Close Relationships
- 10 An International Perspective on Minding
- 11 Minding in Couples Therapy and Counseling
- 12 Limitations and Future Directions
- References
- Index
Summary
More has been written about how relationships don't work than about how they do. We have virtually no language, other than banality, to describe the couple who has been happy together for a long time. We would like them to have a secret, we would like them to have something they could give us. Or that we could give them, other than our suspicion. There is nothing more terrorizing than the possibility that nothing is hidden. There is nothing more scandalous than a happy marriage.
Adam Phillips, MonogamyWhat's on your mind? In answer to this question, the January 6, 1997, issue of USA Today indicated that 64 percent of adults in the United States said that “relationships with loved ones” were “always on their minds.” This survey's outcome hints at the substance of this book. Clearly, one of the things that matter most to most people is the status of their close relationships. These relationships give them psychological sustenance and provide a sense of meaning in life. Thus, our loves, or our hopes for love, are “always” on our mind. A main thesis of this book is that we can use our minds in a much more powerful and enduring way to achieve closeness than is often recognized in either popular or scholarly treatments of how to achieve satisfaction in close relationships.
- Type
- Chapter
- Information
- Minding the Close RelationshipA Theory of Relationship Enhancement, pp. 1 - 10Publisher: Cambridge University PressPrint publication year: 1999