Skip to main content Accessibility help
×
Hostname: page-component-77c89778f8-7drxs Total loading time: 0 Render date: 2024-07-24T21:33:13.736Z Has data issue: false hasContentIssue false

8 - MY BROTHER'S KEEPER

Published online by Cambridge University Press:  30 July 2009

Debra Umberson
Affiliation:
University of Texas, Austin
Get access

Summary

My brother, who is the oldest child, lived only seventy-five miles away from Mother…. I lived 900 miles away…. He could have provided more help and support to my mother during her last six months…. I'm having a difficult time forgiving him for not being there more for my mother and sister.

NORA, AGE FIFTY-ONE

My sister has been a great deal of support for me since my mother's death…. She is twelve years older than I am and we have always seen this age difference as something that has kept us from being closer. But now she has played a leader and mentor role. This has really made me feel very respectful towards her.

ANGIE, AGE TWENTY-NINE

The death of a parent can provide siblings with the opportunity to come closer together, to share their loss with others who uniquely understand the nature of the loss, and to provide and receive support that may ease the loss. On the other hand, the death of a parent is a stressful event: Property must be settled and dispersed and old sibling rivalries and inequities may resurface.

Questions about sibling relationships elicited some of the most lengthy and emotional responses in my interviews with bereaved adults. One of the clearest themes in these interviews is that one cannot generalize about relationships among siblings, even in the same family.

Type
Chapter
Information
Death of a Parent
Transition to a New Adult Identity
, pp. 171 - 193
Publisher: Cambridge University Press
Print publication year: 2003

Access options

Get access to the full version of this content by using one of the access options below. (Log in options will check for institutional or personal access. Content may require purchase if you do not have access.)

Save book to Kindle

To save this book to your Kindle, first ensure coreplatform@cambridge.org is added to your Approved Personal Document E-mail List under your Personal Document Settings on the Manage Your Content and Devices page of your Amazon account. Then enter the ‘name’ part of your Kindle email address below. Find out more about saving to your Kindle.

Note you can select to save to either the @free.kindle.com or @kindle.com variations. ‘@free.kindle.com’ emails are free but can only be saved to your device when it is connected to wi-fi. ‘@kindle.com’ emails can be delivered even when you are not connected to wi-fi, but note that service fees apply.

Find out more about the Kindle Personal Document Service.

  • MY BROTHER'S KEEPER
  • Debra Umberson, University of Texas, Austin
  • Book: Death of a Parent
  • Online publication: 30 July 2009
  • Chapter DOI: https://doi.org/10.1017/CBO9780511500046.009
Available formats
×

Save book to Dropbox

To save content items to your account, please confirm that you agree to abide by our usage policies. If this is the first time you use this feature, you will be asked to authorise Cambridge Core to connect with your account. Find out more about saving content to Dropbox.

  • MY BROTHER'S KEEPER
  • Debra Umberson, University of Texas, Austin
  • Book: Death of a Parent
  • Online publication: 30 July 2009
  • Chapter DOI: https://doi.org/10.1017/CBO9780511500046.009
Available formats
×

Save book to Google Drive

To save content items to your account, please confirm that you agree to abide by our usage policies. If this is the first time you use this feature, you will be asked to authorise Cambridge Core to connect with your account. Find out more about saving content to Google Drive.

  • MY BROTHER'S KEEPER
  • Debra Umberson, University of Texas, Austin
  • Book: Death of a Parent
  • Online publication: 30 July 2009
  • Chapter DOI: https://doi.org/10.1017/CBO9780511500046.009
Available formats
×